You might remember I mentioned that Danny, Laura and I are putting ourselves out there in an effort to help the worried and confused overcome their Sewing Summit concerns.
Here is the official unofficial Sewing Summit Advice Panel.
The first letter comes from Food Worried.
Dear Alternate SS Guru,
I am coming to Sewing Summit from overseas, but I am a bit worried about being understood in American restaurants as I don’t speak American. What the heck does “over easy” mean, why is “creamer” called creamer when it bears no relation to cream, and how do I order a white coffee in American?
I am coming to Sewing Summit from overseas, but I am a bit worried about being understood in American restaurants as I don’t speak American. What the heck does “over easy” mean, why is “creamer” called creamer when it bears no relation to cream, and how do I order a white coffee in American?
Regards,
Food worried
Being the only local, Danny took this one.
Dear Food Worried,
Over easy is a term lazy cooks use to trick customers into thinking they’ve cooked their egg in a fancy way, meant only for the most sophisticated of diners, when in reality, they’ve only moderately cooked the bottom of the egg while the top is still oozing of chicken placenta. And creamer, well that’s thicker, sugary milk usually artificially flavored to imitate a cinnamon roll or other pastry. They come in jugs marked “Fat Free” and “Now with 1/3 less sugar” to lure their potential customers, usually dieting Americans, into thinking they can have the great taste of cinnamon roll with no caloric intake. My recommendation: If you don’t like our creamer or warped psychology, grow up and drink your coffee black.
Lucky for you non-Americans, we like to accommodate those who don’t speak “American” and have placed photos of our restaurant items throughout the menu for your consideration. Point and say “that one”. This is how well seasoned Americans order food. And while your food will not come out looking like the menu item, you may end up with a plate with MOST of the pictured ingredients, which is kind of the same, don’t you think?
Good luck in America,
Alternate SS Advice Guru
She is so funny!! (even when this is the 3rd time I've read it!!). I'm going to enjoy this series so much!
I think the Sewing Summit may never be the same again!
Ha ha!
First, I have to agree with Susan – that poor Summit. (o:
Secondly, I can't wait to see one of your answers, nope – I just can't wait.
Hugs, have a fun Sunday.
the pictures are awesome!! can't wait to meet you guys in person ๐
You are going to have fun! The thing is that the US and Canada have become such coffee snobs that now you can have a massive number of different coffee beans, coffee styles, with or without spice or flavours and real cream, half and half, milk, skim milk, soy milk or black at most restaurants now. Even McDonalds now serves fancy lattes. My sorrow is that last time I was in London there was no where to get a decent cup of coffee – any advice on that for the FQ Retreat??
I'm sure you need a translator for ASS…you do, don't you?.Purleeees….I'm sure you do, even if you don't know you do….now down on the knees and making strange grovelling noises….oh Katy please can I come in your suitcase?
I just about fell off my chair I was laughing so hard. I'm going to enjoy this series there's no doubt about it!
Hmm..I can't help notice that you are the one wearing devil horns.
Good thing I don't like eggs, after reading that explanation of eggs over easy I don't think I could ever eat one again. I am in total agreement with growing up and drinking the coffee black, although I never plan to do either.
Great post, love the sharp witty humor.
you three are going to be a riot. Will this series run until October? My sides will ache laughing for the almost six months leading up to SS
Deja vu xxx
Too funny!! Reading Leanne`s comment reminded me of a French friend`s question, `Why do the English drink tea? Have you tried their coffee?` Yes Leanne, you can get a decent cup of coffee in London!!
lol! that is so hilarious! xo
I'm dying over here trying not to wake up my husband as I read this!
Haha! I didn't know creamer was an American thing… and I didn't know that it wasn't ever meant to have cream in it! I drink tea anyway — I guess it's a lot simpler. ๐
My favourite is *powdered* creamer.
Ok, no it isn't. But I still think it's funny.
Well done Danny! You rock! I'm so tempted to borrow your post to help those non American readers of mine…lol
That is hilarious! Thank you for the giggle!