I apologise for the delay in this final post-summit post, it was entirely my fault as I had the photos on my camera and hadn’t got as far as processing them before about 10 days ago, and then other things came up last Sunday, so there you go.  We also only have the photo in common today, the rest is our own interpretation…

Here are the ASS Gurus assembled in the lobby of Little America, very late on the Saturday evening, freaking out some of the other guests, and highly amusing others (mainly males, even ones with their wives and kids with them, who should have been in bed hours before…)

So now that I’ve been what are the overall conclusions?  Well, it’s like this:

1. If you want to take part in all the swaps etc, you need to join the google group.  Just be prepared that all the crap flying around in there may push you towards a nervous breakdown.

2. For the love of god people, leave room in your luggage for the loot!  If you travel with carry-on only, assume that half of it will be filled.  Really.  Even if you never knew you needed a project involving a table mat, ribbon, a spool of thread and a seam ripper.  Or a small mason jar you could turn into a pin cushion.  If you haven’t got space you will need a person to dump it on backup plan (don’t post mason jars in priority envelopes, no matter how small they are, or they will be even smaller when they get there…)

3. If you don’t drink beer, don’t expect to get a drink at the opening mixer.  If you do, make friends with those that don’t and snaffle their free drink ticket…

4.  If you’re planning on going out to dinner with friends, book a table well in advance, and don’t turn up with another 20 extra people and see if they can ‘just be squeezed in’ otherwise the manager will turn very pale (which is especially impressive if he’s Hispanic) and start to stutter, ask me how I know…

5. If you’re a ‘fruit for breakfast’ kind of a person, buy your own beforehand and eat it there.  Seriously.  The hotel will semi-bankrupt you otherwise, charging $6 for a martini glass full of fruit…

6. If you have a feather allergy and ask the hotel to replace the pillows etc on your bed after an uncomfortable and snuffly night, don’t expect them to actually replace the duvet, they will leave you to freeze to death under a couple of sheets, whereupon you will have to steal the 2 ‘fresh from the quilter’ quilts that your extremely famous room-mate has just got back.

7. The hotel wifi is a challenge if you’re an instagram fan, so be prepared for some interesting contortions all in aid of getting a signal…

8. If you are of a more rebellious nature, you’ll be fine getting a seat at the back of the hands on classes, the keen over-achievers will be up the front, taking the heat off you as you sew through your thumb, the table cloth and half your neighbour’s project.

9. Take something to work on to the lecture classes – no matter how interesting the topic, you will need something to occupy your hands to prevent you from strangling the over-eager person 3 seats along that wants to ask a question at every idiotic juncture.

10. In the evenings there are the ‘partiers’ and the ‘hang out in the sewing roomers’.  The partiers ate, drank and were merry.  I couldn’t tell you what the other ones did, as I wasn’t one of them ;o)  I can tell you that it’s fun to go and distract your friend as she tries to run an evening class though… :oD

11. The loot keeps coming at lunch and closing dinner time, don’t skip them.

12. If the after dinner speaker is boring you to tears, Angry Birds is your friend, just try and play it on your phone rather than your iPad, it’s less obvious…

13.  And finally, you won’t see everyone you wanted to/planned to/hoped to.  You may see some you were hoping to avoid.  Such is life ;o)